Hmm...at first I thought it would be a story in the POV of a star, but this way works too. The visual images in this one are better than most you see around, especially the way you reveal only bits of the aliens, leaving the rest to imagination. The aliens' thinking, though, is bit too familiar (they sound like humans with a slightly different culture, one in which the concepts of "cool" and "uncool" reign supreme). There's "humans are evil" commentary in there, which is, of course, a must, in stories written in alien POV, apparently, though this one sounded a bit too forced for my tastes. But the actual scientific concepts used later put the science back into science fiction, now we just need a conclusion here. --Nonimportant 21:41, 10 May 2008 (UTC)
We're nowhere near a conclusion. It's going to get much longer. Proxima Centauri 18:43, 31 May 2008 (UTC)
I was serious when I wrote the message about avoiding bias against outsiders. Don't expect me to live up to it all the time. Humans slip into that way of thinking too easily. Real aliens are possible. Do aliens get prejudiced against outsiders.? Proxima Centauri 10:50, 21 June 2008 (UTC)
I see you wrote a lot more since I last read it. I'm reading it again now. Chapter five and counting, and I can say I'm extremely impressed. --Nonimportant 16:39, 18 September 2008 (UTC)
Thanks. Proxima Centauri 18:21, 26 September 2008 (UTC)
Well, finished till now. Do continue when you wish to do so. The scientific accuracy is refreshing, as is the intention of making aliens that think differently from humans. I can see that you put a lot of effort into giving us an alien that thought as well as a human, but not like a human. And, as far as I can tell, you did an extremely good job at that. Really. A few weird resemblances, but with a perfectly good explanation. Also, edutainment! --Nonimportant 20:04, 1 October 2008 (UTC)
I’m glad you like the edutainment. The Internet gives possibilities for fiction that can’t get done in traditional paper books or magazines. On paper there’s any amount of “pulp science fiction” that’s entertaining for some readers but not educational at all. There’s also science fiction where authors give educational scientific background but try to compromise. Educating readers without boring them is difficult. On the Internet I didn’t have to compromise. Readers who want to learn can follow the links and read as much or as little as they like. Readers who don’t want to learn can read the adventure and don’t have to follow the links.
I’m not sure what to do about the characters of the aliens. If I make them very different from people then human readers will find it difficult to identify with them. The alien bodies already make this difficult. I’m trying to add many human character traits that evolved on Earth under natural selection.
Dominance hierarchies evolved many times here. Therefore they are plausible among aliens. Similarly altruism towards relatives who carry our genes evolved here and is plausible on Porrila. Altruism towards sexual partners who help us reproduce is also frequent on Earth. Humans are like that. So are gibbons. So are many animals and birds. Proxima Centauri 16:09, 10 October 2008 (UTC)
Ah, I remember this one. I also see you wrote a LOT more. Well, gotta catch up with it. --Nonimportant 22:47, August 11, 2010 (UTC)