The Bender Family Case

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REPORT ON THE CRUEL CRIMES AND DREADFUL DEATHS OF THE BENDERS

Report by Luke Duke (only to be opened in the event of my death)

I guess the story started in the fall of 1873 when the sheriff dropped by.

"Luke!" my wife cried as I sat in my rocking chair picking my toenails. "Luke!"

"Look at what?" I asked her and spat some toenail at the old dog by the fire. I meant to hit the fire, you understand, but I missed and hit the old dog. Serves him right for hogging the fire.

"Luke!" She said for a third time. "That's your name!"

"So it is," I said. "What d'you want, woman?" (I call her woman cos I can'ty rightly remeber her name. Could be Sarah, could be Jane, could be neither.)

"There's a tap on the door!" she said and looked scareder than a turkey when it sees an axe on Thanksgiving day!

"A tap on the door? Funny place to put a tap," I muttered and picked a big hunk of nail off my big toe. Tasted just fine. Better than my woman's cooking anyway.

"Answer the door Luke!" she said.

I sighed and pulled my boot on and walked to the door. The sherrif stood there. "Howdy, Luke!" he said.

"How did he look?" I said and stratched my head with the toenail. "How did who look?"

"I said 'Howdy, Luke' - that's your name!"

"That's my name - don't wear it out. Now what can I do for you, Sherrif?" I aske him, polite as pie.

"I need a few good men to make up a posse!" he said.

"I got a dog, but I ain't got a pussy," I told him.

"No - a posse, Luke. A group of a dozen honest men to catch a group of the evilest people you ever saw!" he said and he sweating so much that his armpits were stained black with the wet. He didn't smell too good neither.

"Oh, a posse!" I laughed. "Where are you going to find a dozen honest man in Cactus Rock?"

"I thought you might like to join, Luke," he grinned. "You're honest, aren't you?"

I was going to tell him the time I stole the bowl of the blind beggar on Main Street when my woman called, "Bring him in Luke!"